Although I am a GA, I attend NA meetings because there are no GA meetings in my country. Things that I learned in The Cabin have kept me going – doing step work with my sponsor via Skype, going for meetings… Slowly things have begun to change, not every day is a bed full of roses but the trust of my family is slowly coming back.
How did I end up at The Cabin? Well, it certainly wasn’t a sweet ride getting in there. I had to reach my own rock bottom before I realized how badly my addiction was affecting my loved ones and me.
Life before The Cabin was certainly an unpleasant one. My gambling addiction took a massive toll on my life especially in 2014, well I actually started in 2002, had an eight years gap and just got into it back in 2010. With these, I had to pay a very heavy price for it. I lost my savings, massive amount of my parents’ savings, my job, my house, my car, my marriage and the thing that most affected me was losing the trust of my family. My life became so unmanageable at one time that I had eight illegal moneylenders after my neck and this situation somehow got me to Phuket. My family had to come there to look for me and bring me back home. I was so helpless that I surrendered and needed help. They did some research and told me about The Cabin. I had a phone interview with one of the counsellors and the very next thing I knew I was on the plane to Chiang Mai the next day.
This was my first time in a treatment centre and it was all new to me, meeting others from different parts of the world. The first few weeks was hard for me, I thought others were judging me, I thought I was different and I thought to myself, am I an addict? Looking back at what I had done, that was the answer to my question. I wasn’t talking much in groups too, just listening to others share. After a couple of weeks, came the family feedback, that really opened me up, I just couldn’t bare the pain that I had brought to my family. As time went by I learned a lot about addiction, the early signs, how to cope with it, how it was  a disease with myself all the while and the next thing I knew my two months’ stay was up and was time for me to head home. Guess what, two days before leaving my parents came and we had a family session together. That was hard but I am glad I did it and got everything out between me and my parents.
As I returned home, I got to a meeting the very next day and have been attending ever since. Although I am a GA member but I attend the NA meetings because they are no GA meetings in my country. Things that I learned in The Cabin has kept me going till today and most importantly the support from my family. Doing the step work with my sponsor through Skype, going for meetings, just being in the present moment really helps me get through the day. Slowly things have begun to change for me, although I would say not every day is a bed full of roses but the trust of my family is slowly coming back, I can communicate more openly with them especially with my dad. Positive things that I did not expect are slowly coming my way. Well I have learned to become more patient and have to keep reminding myself to be one when the compulsive behaviour starts kicking in. I have to keep reminding myself to LET GO and LET GOD all the time. It certainly has been an interesting journey so far coming into my fifteen months in recovery. Take things one day at a time. It certainly works. Till next time.
